Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Jaycena -- 8 years

I know a lot of people are missing you today, each in their own way.  We miss you every day, of course.  But I guess we mark March 28 as day 0 of days without you.  8 years.  2920 days spent knowing what has been lost.  That knowledge will stay with us all of our lives.

So I try to focus in on remembering what was.  That you were fun -- you made your friends and family smile.  You not only shared in the were usually central to it.  You created laughter and memories as you went along.  You were a catalyst in creating so many memories for so many people.

You were growing up into an amazing young woman.  We are left to imagine the finer details, but it's clear who you were.  You were confident, beautiful, strong, smart, funny, and bold.  You were also kind, sensitive, and caring.  You had so many friends that attest to this fact.

We are missing you a bit extra today.  We are remembering you, Laramie, and Brooke.  Sometimes it's hard to believe the world has had the audacity to carry on and keep turning these years.   I never thought I'd quote a Canadian folk song, but I found myself thinking of a line in a Joni Mitchell song, "We're captives on the carousel of time."  How true.  We would stay forever back in time if we could, but it drags us further from our last hug and our last chat each day.

But no amount of time can take away all of the special moments you infused into our lives.  Your laughter is a part of our consciousness.  Your earnestness, sincerity, your honesty made small moments an indelible part of our own hearts and souls.  We carry those exchanges with us every day.  The courage you gave a friend with support is never undone.  The happiness deposited in our lives is real and tangible to this day.  In these ways, you are with each of us still.

We love and miss you Jaycena.  We will never forget how truly amazing and special you were.  And you are with us still in so many ways.  Still love you today, forever, and always xoxo